The Man Has to Protect the Wife...From Herself

There are so many lessons to be learned from the first sin committed; I just want to touch on one of them that really applies to marriage. Reading out of Genesis 2...

Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the LORD God had made. He said to the woman, "Did God really say, 'You must not eat from any tree in the garden'?" 2 The woman said to the serpent, "We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden, 3 but God did say, 'You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.' " 4 "You will not surely die," the serpent said to the woman. 5 "For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil." 6 When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it."

Notice the last part of the verse, Adam was 'with her, and he ate it'. So he was just standing there watching this whole thing go down, then he took a bite of it too (followed her into sin). It's easy to point out that the woman "brought down the man" in this situation but was the man really doing what he was supposed to (quick note: Adam didn't have any scriptures to follow)? Absolutely not; the biblical guidelines for the husband clearly states we are supposed to be the spiritual leaders in the household. That means that it is my job to call Kathy on her sin when I see it; furthermore if I just stand there and let her do something we both know is wrong it is far more likely I will go down the same path.

This is just another call for me to be a stronger spiritual leader, and to set a good example. Imagine what it will be like when I have kids! *gulp*

Timeless Quotes from James Russell Lowell

I came upon these gems today and needed to share some of them...

"Fate loves the fearless."

"An appeal to the reason of the people has never been known to fail in the long run."

"Books are the bees which carry the quickening pollen from one to another mind."

"Democracy gives every man the right to be his own oppressor."

"Mishaps are like knives, that either serve us or cut us, as we grasp them by the blade or the handle."

"Usually when people are sad, they don't do anything. They just cry over their condition. But when they get angry, they bring about a change."

Read more here! http://brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/j/james_russell_lowell.html

Are Men Afraid of Strong Women?

This post may deviate a little from the title, there's a lot on my mind in relation to marriage and relationships in general. A little foreword: I'm reading the book titled "Power of a Praying Husband" and although I'm only in the first chapter, I highly recommend it to all the husbands (and soon-to-be husbands) out there. Stacie does a great job of laying out the biblical case for praying for your wife and what responsibilities the husband has in the marriage. There's a particular verse that should send a fear down every husbands' spine:

1 Peter 3:7 (AMP)
In the same way you married men should live considerately with [your wives], with an intelligent recognition [of the marriage relation], honoring the woman as [physically] the weaker, but [realizing that you] are joint heirs of the grace (God's unmerited favor) of life, in order that your prayers may not be hindered and cut off. [Otherwise you cannot pray effectively.]

If you don't honor your wife your prayers (your direct conversations with God) will be hindered and cut off. I've read this verse before, but it freaks me out everytime I read it! Moving on to the main topic at hand; I got to thinking why some men were afraid of strong women, when I got a revelation! Men aren't afraid of strong women, they're afraid of stronger women! Men do not want to be the weakest link in the marriage; and one can make a case that this is the biblical guideline. As a result, some men will try and keep their woman down so their manhood is not threatened. Let's face some facts, it's easier to bring a woman down than a man (generally speaking). As husbands, we have to work with our lady to bring her up; we need her to be as strong and confident as she can be so that together we can accomplish what God has set out for us to do. If you've entered parenthood, you need your wife to be as strong a mother as she can be.

Moving on to praying for my wife...it's hard. It's not that I'm selfish with my prayers, but I just don't feel comfortable praying for other people that much. I'll pray for my accountability partners, but that's because I know they're praying for me as well - and for some reason that makes it easier for me. Incorporating our spiritual lives has been a huge struggle for me and Kath, because we have no idea where to begin. Sometimes we pray together, sometimes we share verses with each other, but I'm kind of lost on how to make us one as a spiritual unit (and what boundaries need to be set, if any).

Random note: am I missing the point of the " We will wait upon the Lord" song or does it make no sense whatsoever?

Reflections...

Me and Kathy *met* a year from today...what a crazy year it's been!

Anyone have a crystal ball I can borrow?

So I find out in a week if I'm moving to California or not - and my emotions are mixed. There's so many things going on in my head:

1. What will it be like back home now that I'm married?
2. Will Kathy like being back in California?
3. How will our marriage be different?
4. What will my job be like?
5. Will I be able to resume my political aspirations?
6. How is church going to be? Will me and Kathy agree on a church to attend?
7. How are we going to balance our marriage, family and friends?
8. Shoot, what's it going to be like having in-laws over at my house!?

Why Do I Love My Wife? Let Me Count the Ways...

1. She is beautiful (I know they say looks shouldn't matter, but...)
2. She is spunky
3. She doesn't take any crap from me, which makes me become a better person
4. She makes me laugh
5. She's great in bed (what, it's true!)
6. She's optimistic
7. She loves me for me and not who she wants me to be
8. She's very encouraging
9. She knows how to tell me No
10. She pushes me to become better
11. She gives me hope when I have none
12. She's extremely well organized and clean...except for her pile
13. She has the greatest laugh
14. She is very creative
15. She can cook an amazing meal
16. She has an amazing voice
17. She makes our home look so warming
18. She's very supportive
19. Her kisses make all the pain go away
20. She is going to be a great mother

Hear My Plea

Dear Heavenly Father;

Please answer my cries for help. I'm in so much pain I can't breathe. Are you there? Have I fallen completely out of favor with You? My mind needs some light, or at least an answer.

I've done what I thought was right, I answered your call and gave up everything when you asked without asking for anything in return. Where are You now? Why have you left me with nothing but pain and suffering and anguish?

Please lead me out of this. Allow me to continue the mission you've given me. Please.

Happiness

* What makes you happy at work? Being challenged
* What makes you happy at home? Relaxing with my wife!
* What makes you happy with your friends and family? Quality time
* What makes you happy when you're by yourself? Being productive or, if I need to, just relaxing
* What do you love to do? Accomplish things people say I can't do
* What would you do with your life today if you weren't afraid of failure? Failure doesn't scare me
* What's not working in your life? My social life
* What are you currently doing that prevents you from experiencing joy? Not having any friends out here kind of sucks
* What's working in your life? Everything besides my lack of friends
* Who's not working in your life? I wish I was closer with Steve K, Dan, Chris Little and my wife
* Who in your life is subtracting value from and adding misery to it? No one. I quickly weed out people who make my life miserable
* Can you fix any of these relationships, or should you let them go from your life? I let them all go
* What relationships are working in your life? My marriage, Kyle, and my family
* If we were getting together one year from today, what would have to happen for you to be able to tell me that you now have more joy in your life? I would be working on my political aspirations
* What's the single most important thing you've learned about yourself as a result of answering these questions? I really miss politics.

Regret

At some point in your life you will do something you regret doing later, only the magnitude of the mistake is the question. After you've done something you regret and come to the place where you realize it was a mistake one of two things will happen: you will either emerge from the pain a better person or drown in self-pity and self-loathing. The pain of realizing a big mistake encompasses you in a darkness that is indescribable, only those that have been there can relate. You must walk towards Christ's healing power, or forever stay in the darkness - and endlessly try and drown out the pain using other methods.

From personal experience, there are multiple steps you go through on your way to healing. First, there's the realization that you made a mistake. This first step can definitely be the hardest to get past, because our human nature wants to deny that we ever made a mistake. To drown out the negative chorus we will usually do the exact same thing, or try and get others to follow our footsteps so that we don't feel as bad about our own errors.

The second step to recovery, once you have decided to right your wrong, is forgiveness of self. You do not deny that what you did is wrong, you do not minimize the pain you caused yourself and you do not forget your error. You forgive yourself. You must forgive your own ignorance, your own stupidity, your own weaknesses, and whatever else caused you to fall in this pit.

Lastly, you need to mend the wounds you've caused, to yourself and others. Some mistakes will stay with you for life. Ask the murderer spending the rest of his life in jail or the adulterer who will never see his bride again - they may have forgiven themselves but their punishment is lifelong.

2 Corinthians 7:10
"Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death."

Fight For Me

The battle has begun
Two rivals fighting for one
The Enemy on one side promises Fun
The Redeemer opposing urging me run

The fork in the road before me
Fun and ruin or fight and glory
The war that rages within
Between what is right and what is sin

The drinks don't drown out the anger
Only pour fuel on the fire, raising the danger
Either drop the past and run
Or rectify the "waste" with fun

The end result remains to be seen
But we know this for certain:
The race will finish with either regret
Or the completion of a dream